Don’t you hate being bombarded with intrusive and downright inappropriate questions?
“How much money do you make”?
“What street do you live on”?
“How many people have you dated”?
“Why are you single?”
If you’re like me these types of questions catch you off guard and leave you feeling trapped. Oftentimes its hard to determine if someone is genuinely interested in you or fishing for information. I used to feel like I owed everyone an explanation for how I live my life. Even when I felt uncomfortable with a question, for some reason I felt obligated to answer. Unfortunately, I learned the hard way that some of my “friends” saw me as a conversation piece. They were so quick to ask about the details of my life, but suddenly became vague when I started to pry into their lives. They were always around for the latest “tea” on my life, but never went into detail about their own lives. Moreover, I regularly found myself to be part of the latest gossip. Once I came to this sad realization, I decided to re-evaluate myself……and my relationships.
Laugh It Off And Change The Subject
Not everyone deserves a front row seat to your life. Having a sense of privacy has done wonders for my mental health. If you don’t like the direction a conversation is headed, it’s okay to change the subject. Even if it’s a little awkward, maybe they’ll take the hint. However, if you’re dealing with someone who doesn’t get it, plainly tell them that you don’t want to talk about that subject.
Evaluate Your Circle
Are you confiding in people who are trustworthy or nosey? Pay attention to how the people in your life talk about others. Chances are, they could be doing the same to you. Moreover, keep in mind that relationships should involve a mutual exchange of personal details. If someone knows every aspect of your life and you no hardly anything about them, it can be a problem.
What about that good friend who occasionally “slips up”? Sometimes, our closest friends and family members can be the ones who gossip the most. In this case, be aware that whatever you tell these individuals have the potential to be spread. Remember, just because someone is family or a close friend doesn’t mean that they are exempt from respecting your privacy.
Know When To Draw The Line
Occasionally, we deal with intrusive people in the workplace or environments where you need to protect your reputation. In this case, it is essential to know when to stop a conversation. Just because someone is friendly doesn’t mean you should immediately let your guard down. Privacy is essential because you have to maintain a certain image…or it can cost your livelihood. For example, If your coworker asks of you are looking for another job, don’t tell them that you are unless you want to risk everyone else knowing. Sometimes it’s better to deflect and move on rather than say something you’ll regret later.
Now, I’m not saying that you should live under a rock and not talk to anyone for the rest of your life. I’m just saying that you don’t have to feel obligated to share every aspect of yourself. Its liberating to know that there’s something in your life that’s just for you. In the end, it’ll be far more worth it stop explaining yourself and keep ’em guessing.
